I planned to meet with someone to share my story with her. At this point, I had only shared with my counselor, my husband, and a few friends. She was coming over to visit and both my husband and I felt like she needed to know.
We were both stopped in a parking lot and she was behind me in her car. I looked in my rear-view mirror and saw her smiling. I knew once I told her I could not take it back. I was terrified of what she would think of me. I even debated not telling her at all. As I looked ahead again, I noticed a beautiful bird on the sign in front of me. I snapped the photo and smiled remembering “His eye is on the sparrow,” and I knew He was with me. We turned out of the parking lot and headed home.
When I sat down on the sofa to tell her, the words just stumbled out. Her eyes were wide and she looked shocked. When I finished talking, I took a deep breath and waited for her response.
Even though I rehearsed what I would say to her and I tried to anticipate her response, I never saw this coming.
She started by telling me how proud she was of me. She knew and understood how incredibly difficult it was for me to share with her because she had just completed Darkness to Light training for her job. She shared what she learned in her training about the devastating effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse. She also knew that I was not alone and many others suffered in silence. She reiterated to me that I was brave and she believed me.
God was in all of the details and the timing. He was with me every step of the way.
He prompted me to share my story with her. Seeing the bird reminded me that His eye was on the sparrow, and He filled me with courage to tell her. He prepared her with the training and she knew how to best respond to me. She had just completed the training, so it was all very fresh and raw in her mind. His timing was perfect.
God was preparing me to share with others. I was learning to look for Him and to listen for Him. He was teaching me to trust Him, and He was showing me that He would be with me and help me. I was learning to trust His timing, both in the right now and in the waiting.
He was giving me the confidence to take the next step, with Him.
This is post #29 in the Baby Steps series. To start at the beginning, click here.